Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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