kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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