Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
