so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
