he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize