i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
