When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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