He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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