I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
