I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I haven't been this sober since birth.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Randomize
