Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
