we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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