new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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