Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
