She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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