Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
