If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
