i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
