You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
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