ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Randomize