She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
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