I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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