it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
