I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
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