What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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