If that was your dad, he is hot
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
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