So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
