the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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