i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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