hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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