He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Never joke about your clitoris.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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