some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize