I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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