I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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