i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
