I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
