I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
