grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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