I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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