Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(813): View more from Florida

Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that

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(609): View more from New Jersey

My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.

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(601): View more from Mississippi

Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed

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(209): View more from California

what is college for if not random hookup sex?

(951): View more from California

learning.

(209): View more from California

i would literally fuck learning if i could.

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21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Read it at the TFLN blog
(314): View more from Missouri

I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.

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(574): View more from Indiana

So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore

(209): View more from California

You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.

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(360): View more from Washington

And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things

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(316): View more from Kansas

I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD

(316): View more from Kansas

I AM IN MILD DISTRESS

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