Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize