is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
