let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
You were trust falling into bushes
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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