R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
