did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
It's blow job season.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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