Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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