I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
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