just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
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