I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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