I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
